Sitting here in my favorite spot on the couch drinking coffee, watching Ivy draw at the table, and I can’t help but feel like I just want to let this moment sink deep. I want it to go somewhere in my brain where I can easily access it again, years from now when she’s a teenager doing whatever teenagers do. But in reality I know I’ll totally forget it, it’ll be a vague distant “what was that even like?” kind of feeling. That’s why, instead of scrolling through my instagram feed, again, I’m just stopping and documenting. 

I want to remember how we spent the morning signing school agendas and home reading forms; packing backpacks and discussing middle school orientation with Seth, recess-time plans with Oliver. How Ben was so excited about the new underwear I bought him last night. How Ivy asked Oliver to teach her to draw, and how he happily obliged. How I helped Oliver turn his shirt around so it wasn’t backwards, like I do almost every morning. How Seth talked about what video games he wanted to play after swimming lessons today. 

I read something somewhere that struck such a chord with me- it said “it’s not that you want more babies, but you want more time with the babies you already have.” Yes, I do! I want more time! But there’s no more time to be had, and so I’m working on slowing down more, on making the most of the time we’re in.

The other night when I was tucking the bigs in, I prayed with Seth and kissed him goodnight like usual. He looked so content and full of love, like he always does, that I climbed into bed with him and just laid there with him for a few minutes. He held me beside him (he’s almost as big as me now!) and held my hand while I laid there, and I felt like I couldn’t remember the last time I did that. Why do I rush to get those kids tucked in as quickly as possible, like it’s a race to “free time”? Honestly of course by 8pm I’m more than ready for some free time, but I need to remind myself how fast these years fly by, and try my hardest to slow them down!

Anyway, end of emotional rambling. I think with middle school AND kindergarten coming up this fall I’m feeling the feels extra hard right now. I feel like I’m in a near-constant state of lump-in-my-throat, tears-prickling-at-the-back-of-my-eyes emotions. Who knew I would be such an emotional softie when it came to my kids growing up? I’ll tell you, four years ago I wouldn’t have guessed this would be me.


So, may I never forget what it’s like to have little bodies that sit at my table and cover it with countless papers, pens, and markers. May I hold them close and hold them long. 

Oliver’s drawings.

I feel like Oliver’s been drawing basically nonstop since he could hold a pencil. I’m not exaggerating when I say that the first thing he does when he wakes up is reach for a paper and pencil, and it’s usually the last thing he puts away at the end of the day too. He fills every spare minute he can with drawing, and I just love his work! He crams so much amazing detail into every drawing he does. Lately he’s been adding a lot of misspelled words, too, which I love. He does his six year old best. 

These are a few of my favourites from the last couple days:


He’s been reading Dog Man all week and he just loves it. He ordered one off Amazon (with his mom’s help of course) and read it in a day, and now he’s reading one of Ben’s. He still reads solely out loud, stumbling along and asking for help when he doesn’t know the word, or just skipping or making up the words.  I just love it. At the end of the book there’s a “how to draw dog man” section and Oliver clearly aced that lesson. I posted one of those pictures on IG and the author of the book left a comment- so cool for Oliver (and me too!).


Those are Oliver’s mock up logos for a BMX shop. He’s a leftie so he occasionally writes his letters in reverse. I told him he may have a career in graphic design/branding.


That little guy at the end of the first line of that comic strip just kills me.


That pose! That’s A.B. Pronounced “Abby”, like “abs”- like a six pack who’s a guy. 

Here’s another picture of “Ab Man” and his “Abby Sidekicks”. I die. (Still working on getting “b”s and “d”s straight when writing.)


The “ab-y sidekicks” are actually just little six packs with arms and legs!! His imagination runs deep, that’s for sure.

And this last picture is just a school project, but I still love it.


I love that the things that make him lucky are 1) his pets 2) his family 3) his home and 4) fruit. Oliver lives for bananas. If we are out of bananas, life is not complete, so it’s only fitting that he drew a bowl of fruit. 

Oliver is starting art classes in a couple of weeks and I’m really excited to see how that goes. He’ll be learning all kinds of new mediums and I’m curious to see if he’ll like them, or if he’ll just want to stick to good old paper and pencil. Either way I really can’t wait to see what he creates.

What she said.

Yesterday I was working on a quilt block while Ivy played nearby, when she turned to me and said,

“You know, there’s basically no such thing as bad luck, scientifically speaking.”

And she used air quotes when she said “scientifically speaking”.

Five year olds are freaking awesome.

She’s been keeping busy working on a million pieces of paper food for daaaaays now. She’s drawn and cut out fruits and vegetables, slices of pizza, a whole cake, many many pieces of cake, cupcakes, donuts, brownies, jugs and glasses of lemonade, plates, forks, spoons, napkins, and even tiny crumbs. It’s actually seriously awesome. She’ll make you a plate of paper food, hand you a fork and napkin, and do the same herself. She even dabs at the corners of her mouth with her napkin (which is a piece of paper) after she’s eaten her food (all hand drawn and cut out by Ivy). She’s made a very impressive collection already and she still has plans to add to it. She wants to work on hard candies today. 


Today I’m trying to fight off a chest cold/maybe bronchitis for the second day and so Ivy is watching way too much YouTube kids, again. I just dragged myself out of bed after sleeping for 2 1/2 hours, because I felt like I should probably feed Ivy lunch. Because it’s 2 pm.

I had to bake cookies and blondies this morning for Seth’s class bake sale tomorrow, which almost killed me. 

The laundry is piling up but I feel too overwhelmed to carry it to the basement.

Neil’s away in Edmonton till midnight. Being sick and single parenting is a bad combo. I’m trying to figure out if the kids can cook their own supper tonight, or if they’d mind just eating popcorn for supper. 

Anyway I did make it out of bed and onto the couch and I’m sure Ivy won’t mind topping up her screen time by watching some Netflix with me.


She loves wearing that toque with built in headphones while she’s on the iPad, and she will only ever play on the iPad in bed, usually with her door shut. Works for me.

Also, she’s been wearing those pajamas since Monday evening. She even wore them to swimming lessons. That’s how we roll. 

At the zoo.

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It had been awhile since we used our zoo memberships so last week we took advantage of an inservice day and headed out. It’s a long drive for us, but literally every time we’re there I wonder why we don’t come more often. We always have the greatest time and are usually there as long as we possibly can be.

That random toddler kept photo bombing my shots!

My favorite part is the polar bears. I just can’t get over how awesome they are swimming around in the tunnel. The one that was swimming when we were there last week was relatively new to the exhibit and he was so playful. He was basically taking selfies with people. He was selfie’d out by the time the other people were done taking pictures with him, but he still followed Ivy around, and tried to catch Ben’s toque. The zoo volunteer there said she’d never seen him do that before.

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The seals are a lot of fun too. There are so many of them now and the kids had so much fun with them.

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After the polar bears we had a snack and the kids played in the indoor playground. I feel like they could easily spend an entire day in that playground. This time I left them in there and drank my coffee in the restaurant area alone. It was pretty sweet sipping my coffee in the quiet sunshine instead of in the dark noisy play area.

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After the zoo I had promised Oliver he could buy a new fish for his tank. Ivy had to play with the hamsters of course.

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She just loves anything tiny and fluffy. And I mean, they are pretty cute.

Anyway, it was a super fun day. We kind of rushed home because Neil got Jets tickets on the glass last-minute and he was going to take Ben with him.


 Neil was worried about Seth being upset but Seth very matter-of-fact and truthfully responded that he didn’t really care about hockey games and that he’d rather read. Good old Seth. And you know, he wasn’t lying one bit.

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Lately he’s been choosing to read in his room instead of the living room, and since he reads for hours a day, I miss him!  But I don’t blame him, if I could find a quiet place to read all day I totally would!

The big chop.

Last week Ivy asked if she could go get a haircut. She wanted to chop all her hair off. She’s been asking to cut her long hair off and on for a good year so I decided to just go with it. It’s her hair, after all, and if she wants it short, she should be able to have it short. We discussed the pros (less brushing, less tangles) and cons (no braids, no ponytails, it will take a long time to grow back) and she was still adamant about cutting it. So we booked her in for a cut.

First she had to let me take pictures of her beautiful long hair though.

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Ahhh! It’s so thick and long and healthy! Her hair is really amazing- I just love it.

But honestly she hated having it brushed- it was a fight every single time; and she refused to wear braids or ponytails most of the time, so why not cut it I guess.

It was long enough that she could donate her hair, so that was a nice perk.

And, of course, she looks adorable.

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It’s been over a week now and she’s had no regrets. She loves her haircut. I love it too, although I miss that crazy long hair too!

And now someone else who needs it more can have that lovely hair for their head.

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I lied- her one regret is that she didn’t keep her braids to play with at home. 😉

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Ben :: Nine.

My little chubby cheeked baby turned nine yesterday.

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What a kid he is. He’s growing up so fast but he’s still that same kid he’s been since he was a baby, with that sparkling personality, that tender heart and that amazing sense of humor. He’s loyal and loving and good to his friends and to his family.

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He loves clothes. So much. He would probably spend almost all his money on skateboard/BMX brand clothing if he could. He even loves underwear. New underwear makes him so happy, it’s hilarious. I got him a one-piece hooded fleece pajama thing for Christmas and he wears it all the time. He knows what he likes and he has a really good sense of style. He’s particular about his hair and his appearance and careful to brush his teeth twice a day. I just love this about him, although I feel like it’s gonna make me go broke. His hat/toque collection is almost as extensive as Neil’s, and, like Neil, he refuses to leave the house without something on his head.

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He loves BMX biking. LOVES it. He asked for a new BMX bike for his birthday. Not a Wal-Mart kind, but a real BMX bike. Like a billion dollar kind. He said if everyone chipped in and just gave him money for his birthday then he could get a bike. He said that would be all he needed. And so that’s what we did. Neil ordered a bike for Ben, after browsing online with him for hours. Ben NEEDED gum colored tires. And he was very particular about the bike color too, of course. You can’t just buy Ben any old BMX on sale.  He wants to ride in style. And so he will, this summer. He loves his new bike. And strangely enough, the weather has been that he could practically take it for a ride now. So far he’s stuck to riding it around the basement so he doesn’t get the tires too dirty.


This year Neil and our friend built a backyard rink. Ben has loved skating there. Every time we’re there he’s just so happy. And he knows it, and appreciates it. He says things like, “This is so awesome Mom. I love it so much.” I love how he loves things. He loved the ocean and he loves hikes through woods with big rocks and roots to jump all over.

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He loves drawing, especially funny faces or potty-humor related things. For his presentation at school last week he taught his classmates how to draw a funny face. He was a very distinct style to his funny faces, and always draws them the same way. Since we watched his presentation a few times at home for practice, now Ivy draws them the same too.

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Ben doesn’t like hot dogs and he doesn’t like icing. Such a weird kid that way, I just don’t get it. He does love pizza, like any normal kid. He requested crepes with fruit filling for his birthday supper, and a Reese’s ice cream cake with a “nine” candle. Not nine candles, a “nine” candle. He picked the cake part out of the ice cream cake. Ivy liked the cake part and not the ice cream part (girl after my own heart). Next time I’ll make them share a piece since they like opposite parts.


It’s extremely hard to get a picture of Ben with a “normal” face. Weird faces are his normal, to be honest.
I love my nine year old Ben. I told Ivy today that I’m the luckiest Mom in the whole world. She asked me if I knew that some moms have five or even six children. Yes, I knew that. Well those moms are luckier than you, Mom, she said. I said that those moms are very very lucky, yes, but unfortunately for those moms, they don’t have the very best four children in the whole wide world. Ben is such a vital and amazing part of our family and every day I thank God that I get to be his mom. There’s no one else I’d rather be.


Happy ninth birthday, Benji. I’ll keep you forever, for sure.

ps Ben turns two, three, four, five, six, seven, and eight. So many birthdays I’ve blogged! Every year I birthday blog I sit and read through all the other birthdays and I’m reminded what a thief time is!

Kaua’i day 5!

I’m so exhausted guys. It’s 8:53 pm and this is the first time I’ve been awake this late all week. I’m trying to stay awake past 9 so Neil doesn’t think I’m a total loser but I’m really struggling here.


This morning we fed the koi. Again. Ivy was brave enough to do it this time.

Obviously we have plans to do it again tomorrow. 

After fish feeding we went on a PLANE RIDE!


We went on a six passenger plane for a tour around Kauai. It was amazing!! 


This island is so beautiful. The landscape is just so dramatic- it takes your breath away, really. We saw sooooo many waterfalls, too. The pilot showed us a bunch of places where movies were filmed and as totally corny as it is, flying up to the waterfall that was filmed in Jurassic Park, while listening to the Jurassic Park soundtrack was SO. FUN. So, so fun.


Right after we took off we spotted whales playing in the ocean, and the pilot circled around for us to see them some more. So great. Seth and I saw a pod of dolphins too. Would have been cooler on the water but still neat from the sky too! 

Approximately ten minutes into our flight Ivy fell asleep.


I’m calling it a very expensive nap. Oliver nodded off towards the end and Ben fell asleep for a few minutes too. We’re really wearing them out on this holiday. 

After our flight we went to Lydgate beach park. There is the coolest playground I’ve ever seen there. It is so big and soooo fun. So many nooks and crannies for kids to run through- a lot of spaces where adults have to really crouch down to get through and some adults wouldn’t fit at all I don’t think. They played tag and hide and seek in there for forever.


There’s a really neat sheltered beach area there too. It’s all built up with big rocks so the big waves don’t get in. Seth and Neil went snorkelling again and saw some lots of fish. The rest of the kids just played in the calm waters.

I begged/pleaded/bribed/forced the kids to take some pictures after swimming. They hated me for it but obliged because I told them they wouldn’t get supper if they didn’t.


They’re so cute though, right? You’d never know the trouble they give me when it comes to photos.


After the beach we went to Kapa’a for supper where it happened to be the big town farmer’s market/live music thing they do on the first Saturday of the month. Let’s just say we were lucky not to lose a kid. Everyone was having a tough time trying to decide what to eat but Oliver saw some corn on the cob and he was sold. I added in a chicken taquito for him and he was just so happy. The other boys had pizza and Ivy ate half of my supper, which I was thoroughly enjoying and had no intention of sharing. I had to share with Seth too to be honest. Those little jerks.

Tomorrow Neil is taking the bigs on an ATV tour and me and the littles are gonna chill, at least for a couple hours.

Hey, I stayed up till 9:16! #winning